Where Are You At?

Are you on the pew?
Are you on the pavement?
Are you in turmoil?
Are you in a season of grief?
Are you in a storm?
Are you in a season of harvest?
Are you running down a road?
Are you in a coffee shop surrounded by people but feeling lonely?
Are you in a home sharing life with your friends?

"Running with a Friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light."

Are you running the race?
Are you running with a Friend?

He will never leave you nor forsake you. Hebrews 13:5

Faithful Follower or Pharisee

This week has been a week of inner turmoil. A week in which I was digging deep and mulling through my story. The story of why I believe what I believe and how my story has been written over the course of my life. There were two things that kept revealing themselves to me. I was not sure how they were connected or which paragraph of my story they were but I felt compelled to think and write and write and listen and mull and churn and this is what was spoken to my heart. You see I like you have a story. A story of how God won my heart. How He revealed his mighty power to me. How he went before me and how He showed me His Grace.

I was not "churched" growing up. My parents did not dress us in our Sunday best each week and take us to church. My dad was connected to a church but did not attend. It was 3 very distinct early years experiences that are burned in my memory. These memories are what I recall as the events that won my heart.

*The very first memory of church for me is of a white stereo typical church on the corner. It was just down from my uncles home (brother to my dad). I remember going there for Sunday school if we were at my uncles and sometimes going to my uncles just to go to Sunday school. I don't remember the adults taking us I remember them sending us....It was only two houses away so certainly we would not get lost.

It was through this church that I met Melanie and Martha. This was the church where my middle brother would memorize and recite the books of the Bible. To this very day I am proud that he could do that. I can not tell you that he is a believer or follower but I can say...God has resonated his heart and so the seed is still there.

Melanie and Martha would be my first people to influence me. I still have that very King James thou shalt Bible Martha, Martha Flamingo gave me in 1982. (I don't have it here with me so it may have been 1984)

These people would be ones whom I grew to look up to and who started my hunger. They were kind and gentle and loving and you could feel the Lords love radiating off of them.

*The second person to influence my journey was my uncle. Yep the one that lived right next to the church. You see...him and my aunt were born again. The sinful life they lived as teens was now thrown to the wayside and they had arrived. They knew (and still do) the Bible inside and out and for anyone that didn't well...I am sure you can decided what happened to those people. I was one of those people that did not know the Bible like they did. Unfortunately as a child I did not understand what shame was and so these people who were lovers of the Lord or at least the law would be my major influences in knowing Christ for the next long years of my life. It was here that I began to believe God was a God of meanness and shame. My uncle that claimed to be of the Lord would stand over me and use power and force to make me feel lesser and comply. Yes you got it....I did not want any part of feeling this way and if he represented God...no thank you!!!

*The third person to influence my life was my aunt. I will share her name with you because it is now as the Lord has spoken to me that I can see the beauty in the ashes.

My auntie Ro'Blane (my dads sister) was a believer. See her beautiful smile in this picture. There was no mistaking this. Everyone in our small town knew this. She attended church on Sunday morning, Sunday evening, Wednesday evening and was always involved in events with and through the church.

You see this family was broken. Broken relationships broken marriages broken spirits. But my auntie Ro as we called her had a sweetness about her.

Many complained she spent to much time at church. This did not stop her. She humbly went about serving the Lord. She was a woman who worked hard for her children as if she was working for the Lord. She was a faithful servant, a loyal friend and mother.

This is what it was about my aunt Ro that fills my heart. She was not a Pharisee. Yes she knew the Word. She hid it in her heart. She met Yahweh in the most intimate places. Her relationship with God was hers and it was a heart thing. She was not one to Bible beat or enforce "rules". She lived her life humbly while fulfilling the calling placed on her life by her True Love.

I must tell you that I was not close to her. I did not share me with her. Remember I was not wanting to know this God that was mean and shaming.

There are two things I remember about her other than the green chair in her living room that I loved....

I remember that in her bedroom always beside her bed was her Bible and her study "stuff". She loved HIM and she desired to know HIM more and...

I remember her blue tambourine. You see we attended (for me later in life) a charismatic church and she loved to worship Him. She sang out and praised Him while shaking that tambourine in a way that made you want to dance. Aunt Ro actually should have been singing next to Travis Cottrell or Paul Brandt or even singing in a quartet next to her brothers. They all love to and can sing....

Even as I sit here and write I can only feel and see a humble woman in love with the Lord...never for her glory...always for HIS.

My auntie Ro'Blane died of cancer. Through her battle she always believed if God wanted her to live, life He would give. If He wanted to take her home she would dress in the best wedding gown of white and look forward to the day she would meet her Bridegroom and go home with HIM. And she did...dressed in white with her blue tambourine she met her Bridegroom.

I can not wait to see her. I know she will be singing and praising the Lord shaking that tambourine. When I see her I will thank her for unknowingly showing me what

John 5:37-40 means.....

And the father Himself, who sent Me, has testified of Me. You have neither heard His voice at any time, nor seen His form. But you do not have His word abiding in you, because whom He sent, Him you do not believe. You search the Scriptures, for in them you think you have eternal life; and these are they which testify of Me. But you are not willing to come to Me that you may have life.

Aunt Ro'Blane had nothing false in her. The pharisee was not in her. It was through her humbleness that I was attracted to my LORD and SAVIOR Jesus Christ. She painted a true picture of Him. She had a heart felt love for Him...and she did not even have to tell me...it radiated off of her. She was a faithful follower.

Who are you? Are you a Faithful follower or a Pharisee? What are you communicating to people about Gods love for us?

Lord I Pray that I am a faithful follower and that through me others can see your love and beauty and promises of abundant life.

Whom Then Shall I FEAR

Fear
A feeling , an emotion that grips us in a negative gut wrenching way. It is a feeling that holds us back from moving forward in a direction of peace and abundance. It is a voice in our head telling us we are not worthy…something negative is going to happen to us. It is a word that can take us in a spiral downward to a place of hopelessness and despair. It is a word that can impair us!

Fear presents itself in many forms…
Fear of REJECTION
Fear of LOSS
Fear of BEING UNWORTHY
Fear of HARM
Fear of POOR HEALTH
Fear of DEATH
Fear of BROKEN RELATIONSHIPS
Fear to TRUST FULLY
Fear of JUDGEMENT
Fear of CHANGE
Fear of TRUTH
Fear of WHAT LIES AHEAD
Fear to MOVE FORWARD

Fear is bondage that holds us from knowing God more intimately. It holds us captive to thoughts of unworthiness. These thoughts often thrust us into a place of despair. It takes us to a place of uncertainty when what we really long for is absolute assurance. Assurance that we will be loved, that we can pay the mortgage, that we will recover from our ailments, that we will live to be 100, that when we hurt we can share our hurt with the person who hurt us without being rejected.

But He was in the stern asleep on a pillow. And they awoke Him and said to Him, “Teacher do You not care that we are perishing?” Then He arose and rebuked the wind and said to the sea, “Peace, be still!” And the wind ceased and there was a great calm. But He said to them, “Why are you so fearful? How is it that you have no faith?” And they feared exceedingly, and said to one another, “Who can this be, that even the wind and the sea obey Him!” (Mark 4:37-41)

Friends I encourage you to embrace courage to run the race set before you not in fear but by taking a deep spiritual breath and rest on the assurances of the Lord. Fear is not of the Lord.

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. (2 Tim. 1:7)

For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, “Abba Father.” (Romans 8:15)

Now and for all eternity we as believers in Christ Jesus can live not trouble free but fearlessly by His grace. The invitation is there for all even if they have never heard of God (Eph. 3:6). All people can embrace His offering for abundant life experiencing a life of freedom from fear. Do not allow fear to creep in. Rest in His promises.

Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge. (Psalms 62:8)

But the Lord is faithful, and He will strengthen and protect you from the evil one.
(2Thess. 3:3)

Friends do not give weight to your fears. We can not conquer our trials on our own. Cast all your cares upon Him and allow His power to overcome the fear that binds you. Allow Him to show you abundant life found only through a relationship with Him. We must stay true to and live by faith, holding fast to our trust in the Lord. If He is for us who can be against us?

The Lord is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life; Of whom shall I be afraid? When the wicked came against me to eat up my flesh, my enemies and foes, they stumbled and fell. Though an army may encamp against me, my heart shall not fear; Though war may rise against me, in this I will be confident. (Psalms 27:1-3)

Who holds your heart? Who are you in relation with? Where does your faith rest?

Courage

Dorothy is a girl who lives in a farmhouse in Kansas with her Uncle Henry, Aunt Em, and little dog Toto. One day the farmhouse, with Dorothy and Toto inside, is caught up in a tornado and deposited in a field in the Land of the Munchkins in the Land of Oz. The falling house kills the ruler of the Munchkins, the Wicked Witch of the East.
The Good Witch of the North comes with the Munchkins to greet Dorothy and gives Dorothy the Silver Shoes that the Wicked Witch of the East had been wearing when she was killed. In order to return to Kansas, the Good Witch of the North tells Dorothy that she will have to go to the "Emerald City" or "City of Emeralds" and ask the Wizard of Oz to help her.

On her way down the road paved with yellow brick, Dorothy frees the Scarecrow from the pole he is hanging on, restores the movements of the rusted Tin Woodman with an oil can, and encourages them and the Cowardly Lion to journey with her and Toto to the Emerald City. The Scarecrow wants to get a brain, the Tin Woodman a heart, and the Cowardly Lion, courage. All are convinced by Dorothy that the Wizard can help them too. Together, they overcome obstacles on the way including narrow pieces of the yellow brick road, Kalidahs, a river, and the Deadly Poppies. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Wonderful_Wizard_of_Oz)

Like many of us life has thrown Dorothy a tragedy and continues to throw them at her as she journeys to the Emerald City to see the Wizard in order to get help. Dorothy ventures off with courage doing what is right in order to come that much closer to the one who is in power. In this story it is the Wizard.

Along the way Dorothy picks up a few friends. As they journey together toward the Emerald City all searching for something that has been missing in their lives they encourage and support each other overcoming the adversity that they face due to their circumstances.

What these travelers find on their journey is trickery and evil. Even upon the arrival to the Emerald City and the attempt to meet with the Wizard the Wizard tries to evade them. Yet another mishap reveals to them that the Wizard is himself a person not a powerful being that can solve their problems.

Through this journey they learn several important things. They learn that it is easier to journey when you have a support group to help you get through the tough times. They learn that no one can give them a brain, a heart or courage. They already have these things inside them they must just choose to believe. They also learn power does not come from man and man alone cannot fill your emptiness. Dorothy, the scarecrow, the tin man and the cowardly lion had the courage to keep going in order to find the ultimate prize.

Are you on your journey to find the ultimate prize? We as believers are offered the ultimate prize. We can have the milk and honey that God promises. We can enter into the Promiseland. It is there for us.

Courage is not being fearless. Life is full of fearful events and happenings. Courage is the attitude of facing anything recognized as dangerous difficult, or painful instead of withdrawing from it. Courage is not the absence of fear it is the will to move forward in spite of it.

God promises us in Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.
When you fear rejection, financial troubles, job loss, not being worthy, tribulations, broken relationships, know that the Lord is the same yesterday, today and forever.

8:31-39 What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?

When you have the courage to take up the Cross and follow Jesus He promises to go before you. 2 Timothy 1:7 God has not given us spirit of fear but of power and of love and a sound mind.

The Lord led the Israelites on a journey through the wilderness to take them to the Promiseland. Each destiny on this journey had a purpose. The purpose was to reveal Himself in a mighty way so they would know that he was with them always and He was the all powerful. Their job was to believe fearlessly without questioning and complaining and focus their thoughts on their destiny….the Promiseland. The purpose of the wilderness journey was to align their hearts with His plan. They travelled in fear often wondering where their food was coming from, where they would get water, how they would get away from Pharaoh when all there was the Red Sea in front of them. It took COURAGE to believe that Yahweh would deliver them.

Following the Lord and laying all down to embrace something new the Lord wants to do takes COURAGE. COURAGE to listen, COURAGE to hear, COURAGE to obey, COURAGE to lay it all down to receive the joy of the Lord.

Like Dorothy and her friends who journeyed searching for the ultimate prize having to be courageous and face what lied ahead even when it was scary and seemed like they would never get to the Emerald City….We are called by God to trust Him and believe His promises to draw near to him intimately so He can give us Promiseland living.

Are you willing to have the COURAGE to follow the Lord knowing that His promises are Truth and in Him all things are possible even when He is asking you to go beyond comfort and complacency and stop complaining so He can fulfill His promises and give you the desires of your heart and abundant life?

Who are you journeying with. Are they enCOURAGErs? Are they speaking Truth to you and inviting you to walk closer to the Lord? Are they heading to the Promiseland beside you?

Continuing the Journey

In an attempt to fill an insatiable hunger to know more I have continued on my journey...

One In A Million by Priscilla Shirer is my current study. This study takes the reader on a journey through the wilderness with the Israelites. A 40 year journey that is. A journey that should have taken only a few months!

I am also reading (yes it it that insatiable hunger to know more) Desire by John Eldredge. This reading has revealed to me that Desire is given and if we listen, hear and obey it is then that we are given abundant life and desire is fueled and alive in us!

So my journey has been that of desiring to experience God the way the Bible tells me I can and believing it to be as amazing as it says (yes my part of the experience is sometimes challenging, not easy)and fulfilling that longing, that desire for life as it was meant to be.

Through these two pieces (which I am in the middle of right now) I have learned that the wilderness journey is a journey in which God uses to reveal HIMSELF in a mighty way. Easy...I think not. Dry sometimes...yes. Empty sometimes..yup! But I remind myself that he allows these experiences of inner emptiness to show me that I can not fill them myself with money, status, material objects, love from humans, earthly resources etc. It is a filling I can only receive from HIM. He wants us to seek to fulfill our emptiness our hunger by searching the Word, spending time in prayer, and yielding to the Holy Spirit. He wants us to recognize this hunger as His gift.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied Matt. 5:6

For He satisfies the hungry soul and fills the hungry soul with goodness Ps. 107:9

During the in between times of God revealing Himself mightily don't grow idle. God is still working in you and in your life. Do not give the enemy opportunity to deceive you. Keep seeking HIM. Something mighty will happen.

As far as Desire....
I have many desires in my heart. If you can believe it spending time with my girls is one of them. I long for relationships. I long for people to be connected to someone who will share with them and support them. This blog thing for me is a God thing. The studies we do together are a God thing...(many of you have heard the stories 502 times so I will spare you 503 til next time:) HEHE) His Word says He will give you the desires of your heart and he knows the desires of your heart. He knew I desired for women to be connected. And for any of you who have blessed me with your time you knew my desire for connection as well:):)

Here is the amazing news...
I could not have this desire and have the other desires of my heart come to frutation (even though He promises me He will give me these desires) until He had my heart right where He wanted it.

And you shall remember that the Lord your God led you all the way these forty years in the wilderness, to humble you and test you to know what was in your heart, whether you would keep His commandments or not. So he humbled you, allowed you to hunger, and fed you with manna which you did not know nor did your fathers know, that He might make you know that man shall not live by bread alone, but man lives by every word that proceeds from the mouth of the Lord. Deut. 8:2-4

You see my friend...God knew my desires but He needed to humble me, purify my heart, thwart me if you will. When we set our hopes on Him not on "me" he fulfills our desires. Again not with out struggles. I have had a few struggles and still do....You see I will remain hopeful even in a broken world. It is through this hope that my desire is fueled and desire can not live without hope.

I still have desires...many...and I can't wait to see what He reveals to me as I continue my journey to Canaan..the Promiseland.

Will you join me? Will you follow the Lord as He leads you to the Promiseland??

Wounded Healers

Does GOD call specific people who have specific pain into the authority of empathy?

As the calling on my life has unfolded I have had an aching in my heart for people to be connected, to carry each others burdens, to know that GOD loves them, to know that in HIM there is freedom.

Half way through Anointed Transformed and Redeemed: A Study of David authored by Priscilla Shirer, Beth Moore and Kay Arthur I have shared hours with women in pain. Pain from a special needs child, pain from a strained marriage, pain from finances, pain from children gone astray, pain from broken friendships, pain from physical ailments, pain from the unknown. A pain that causes confusion. Pain that causes anger toward GOD. A pain that keeps us in bondage from experiencing HIS abundant love for us.

Through this time with women I also sense a longing, a desire to connect with others. A connection at a deeper level. A level of longing. Longing for understanding and unconditional love. A longing to be real and authentic. A longing to seek HIM and understand HIM intimately.

GOD is a faithful GOD true to HIS promises. As this time has passed I have seen HIM working mightily in and through these women as well as in and through me. It is amazing to see HIS glory and HIS fruit as we bow in obedience to HIM and HIS anointing on our lives.

As we journey through our life knowing GODS promises and clinging to them with all our might, with all our heart, there is often still a feeling of defeat. Archbishop Desmond Tutu once said.."LOVE is much more demanding than law." Is this what makes it so difficult to TRUST our GOD. LOVE is demanding. It demands us to die to ourselves and our selfish ambitions. Love demands us to put all of our anger and pain aside and look to HIM. HE is LOVE. It demands us to sift through the pain of our existence, of our past, of our present and lay it at HIS feet and heed his calling and anointing on our lives. It demands us to LOVE others as HE first loved us. We ask HIM to forgive our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. We must forgive those who have hurt us.

You see HE wants us to rely solely on HIM. HE wants us to have the most intimate relationship with HIM because HE first loved us. HE wants us to stop trying to manipulate HIM, stopping trying to do it our way and relate to HIM the way he relates to us. HE is our FATHER. HE knows what is best for us even when we are unsure about our situation and we believe we can handle it on our own. Let HIM dwell in the innermost secret places of our hearts.

These women need each other. Need each other for encouragement, discernment and ultimately for HIS glory.

HE wants us to be in relation with each other to carry each others burdens. HIS WORD says "Whenever two or more are gathered, I am there". Is it possible that if you listen closely to HIS whisper and you obey HIM FULLY and WHOLE HEARTEDLY that HE will use you to be a Wounded Healer, a person who has experienced pain and can empathize and educate others about HIS unfailing LOVE and HIS promises. To share with others and acknowledge GODS ability to provide security for those who seek HIM first.

As we acknowledge HIS work in and through us and we are left in awe saying "Who am I, O Sovereign LORD, and what is my family that you have brought me this far?" We are able to be healed/forgiven. AS we acknowledge that GOD is up to something good in us, something crucial to our spiritual growth we are able to embrace GODS healing and turn away from our sinful nature and devastation experiencing only his divine restoration. Through our healing others can begin to see and desire what you have. Through HIM you then can be that someone who offers healing to a sister in pain.

King David sinned. He did not wallow in his sin he repented and seeked the LORD. David had a heart for the LORD and GOD used him in a mighty way to see the fulfillment of HIS promises (2 Samuel 7:18-29). Allow GOD to use you in a mighty way! Be a Wounded Healer!

HE is the ALPHA and the OMEGA. The same yesterday, today, tomorrow and forever! HE never leaves us or forsakes us! HE chose you! HE chose to LOVE you! HE chose to prosper you. Have courage to see the fulfillment of GODS promises and share HIS love with the wounded.

In HIM Authentically!

A Long Pause During A Roller Coaster Journey

Although I have not shared lately via the blog GOD has been using me mighty to Glorify HIM. It never ceases to amaze me how HIS promises are revealed and HIS invitations to hear and obey him are so sweet.

I love the chastisement he gives. I have recently experienced that when I heed the chastisement recognizing my sin and then repent he does make beauty out of ashes. He continues to whisper in my ear...TRUST ME TRUST ME...Michelle your doubting and letting insecurities fill my space....TRUST ME...and so I do and HE again honors his promises.

I have embarked on the next journey he has called me too. We have just begun Anointed Transformed and Redeemed a Bible Study about David.
A man anointed with a heart for GOD. Davids story is beautifully unfolding and speaking in a mighty way about allowing GOD to be in your every moment....A GOD conscious. Today I actually for the first time prayed for someone while they were in the midst of a storm (a tough meeting) only to see his promises fulfilled once again.

Please follow me on this amazing journey of obtaining some Rama and living with a GOD conscious.

I will share more on the stories of HIS faithfulness soon!